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Benching vs. Cushioning — Online Dating Terms Explained On This Web Site

Benching vs. Cushioning — Online Dating Terms Explained On This Web Site

Nowadays, there’s seemingly a brand new term that is dating every nuanced type of behavior. The guy you’re speaking to in Tinder abruptly prevents responding? You simply got ghosted. Your kind-of boyfriend has been flaky? You’re most likely being benched. Or maybe you’re being breadcrumbed or cushioned—it’s hard to inform.

Why will be the niche terms proliferating? Relationship expert Susan Winter attributes our growing lexicon towards the impact technology has on love. There is a lack and”ease of guidelines around dating,” she claims. “There’s less dedication generally speaking. These have grown to be the dance that is regular you don’t think it is planning to exercise, it is simply better to ghost them because you don’t wish to handle it. It is easier to bench them because you’re getting greedy.”

If that seems cavalier, it’s. “It’s heightened by the length between you and the person you’re communicating with, exchanges can feel less personal that we have because of online technology,” says Winter, explaining that because there is so often a screen. “a great deal of our interactions and hookups aren’t that significant anymore, when the connection itself is not significant, our morals around exactly how we connect to them are a definite lot more lax.”

Dating is difficult enough without the need to consult well a dictionary. So let’s break up exactly what these terms actually suggest, shall we?


First, ghosting—perhaps the most used regarding the bunch—simply means vanishing with no trace. “You cut them down totally, and there’s no forewarning. An additional period of time, should you want to dump somebody, you state, ‘It’s over.’ they’ve a basic proven fact that it is closing, and there won’t be interaction. However with ghosting, you’re not really offered the heads up,” claims Winter.


Cushioning is equally unkind. “It’s utilized to spell it out somebody already in a relationship that is overtly flirting with other people simply to have them type of warmed through to the side—just in the event. (more…)